Good morning Paraguay!

Q: How do you lose your body weight in sweat by just standing still?
A: PARAGUAY!

We crossed from Argentina into Paraguay at around 8:00am Sunday, and guess what? Paraguay is the hottest country ever. It was hot at 8:00am and continued to get hot and never really relented. Sure, other places have been hot (y´know, like the DESERT), but Paraguay is like sitting in an oven in the middle of the desert. Very hot indeed.

So after our night bus from Salta (not exactly a cold place itself) to the border town of Clorinda, we got a taxi to the frontier, spoke with some border officials on the Argentine side who made us play my charango otherwise they said we couldn´t cross. Passport duties had to be taken care of on the other side of the international bridge, so we duly walked across.

Upon reaching passport control at the other side, the Argentine immigration officer took a flick through our passports and declared there was a problem. Apparently we were missing an Argentine entry stamp somewhere and were illegally in the country. Now, this wasn´t the case, and we slowly went through every single stamp in our passport with him over and over ("entrada Argentina...salida Argentina...entrada Chile...salida Chile..." and still he found fault. Couldn´t work out whether the problem was that one of Steve´s Argentine entry stamps was not in order, or if in going to Ushuaia we had entered and left Argentina several times in one day, coupled with the fact that a week later we went to Uruguay for only one day, thus confusing the immigration officer. Whatever the case, he wasn´t having any of it and just kept shaking his head. Eventually, he typed some stuff into his computer (I´m supposing they actually have a database of all this to keep tabs on folk), and came back with some fresh exit stamps for our passports.

Yeah, take that.

So we bargained with a taxi driver and managed to half the price of a taxi from the border 40km to Asuncion, crossing the Rio Paraguay on the way. Sweating a lot.

Asuncion is a very strange city indeed. Very small, it doesn´t feel like the capital of a nation. As we arrived to one of the main plazas in the centre of town, everything was completely deserted. Exploring later yielded few people as well. But the small and compact centre is pretty nice, with mostly victorian buildings and a small presidential palace, a small national monument (the Panteon de los Heroes), and small plazas (Plaza Uruguaya, Plaza de los Heroes and Plaza del Comidas).

So far, people have been very friendly here. Tourism really hasn´t taken off in Paraguay at all, our hotel (no hostels or backpacker accommodation) is empty, and people are eager to talk to you. So it´s nice.

And, seeing as Paraguay is a kind of forgotten corner of South America, here´s some things I learned:

Upon independence from Buenos Aires and Spain, one of Paraguay´s first dictators was a paranoid man named Dr Francia. Fearing assasination, he declared that all buildings must be under a certain height so that his guards could spot would-be assassins. This means other than a few modern sky scrapers, all the older buildings in Asuncion are remarkably low.

In the 1860s, the dictator Francisco Lopez, believing himself to be the Napoleon of South America, felt threatened and declared war on Brasil. Now this is a silly move considering Paraguay´s tiny size compared to Brasil, but what happened next was even worse. Argentina wouldn´t let Paraguay move its troops through the Misiones province to get to Brasil, so Lopez declared war on them as well. And, Uruguay, apparently wanting to get in on the laugh allied Brasil and Argentina as well. So take a look at a map if you´re not familiar, and try working out the sense of Paraguay fighting with Brasil, Argentina and Uruguay.

Almost half the population was killed in this war (the war of the triple alliance), and that figure includes children as young as 12, who were enlisted when reserves ran low.

Construction of the presidential palace was even finished by child labourers, because there were simply no adults.

In the 1930s Paraguay also warred with Bolivia over the inhospitable wilderness of The Chaco, which divides the two countries.

has a fairly fascinating history, does paraguay.

and it´s also very hot. about 45 degrees.